defeat the disappointment

Finding out four years of work has become not good enough for what you want. How do you deal? Well-- I suppose you must simply suck it up and just deal with it already... this is what I'm telling myself. There's nothing more to do than defeat the disappointment and do better next time-- that's where I'm headed. And I know just what I need-- Evil 7-hour test with 5000 pages of study material...(ding!) we're going into round 2.
I'll enjoy a year off... there hasn't been a year of my adolescent and adult life when I've not been in school. I'll go to Ecuador for a month, I'll get a real job and earn a full-time salary for once. I'll study for the test and concentrate on life for a bit, find the more important things and then the cycle starts again. It's all for the best-- it always is, this is why we can't say, "it's not supposed to be this way," because if it wasn't supposed to be that way, it wouldn't be. But it can ultimately be anything...I value my life, I value my dream and I believe in myself-- bring it on.
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